The Art of Forgiveness

Then came Peter to him, and said, Lord, how oft shall my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? till seven times? Jesus saith unto him, “I say not unto thee, Until seven times: but, Until seventy times seven.” Matthew 18:21-22 (KJV)

One of the things that I did when I was younger was hold grudges. How long did I hold a grudge? Take this extreme example. The first girl I ever kissed was a girl named Yvette, and I kissed her on the playground in first grade. After I kissed her, she smacked me right on the cheek. As all six year olds are when they are embarrassed, I cried in shame, but then I vowed my revenge. Pretty Shakespearian for a six year old you might say, huh? So I waited, and waited. And then when the perfect opportunity came, I walked right up to her and returned the favor! Yes, that was terribly wrong, and I know that.

However that was only half the story. The other half was how long it was between slaps, which was three whole years!  The thing is she had no idea it was coming, and here I was holding in all these feelings that truly were unwarranted.  Looking back, I see how silly it was to hold in that type of anger and bitterness. Fortunately today, my spiritual maturity has finally helped me become much more a forgiving person because I have learned through the grace that has been given me through Jesus Christ. The new Kent probably takes that slap, and says, “Yeah, I deserved that one.” At least I think I would 

The incident reminded me of a broadcast about forgiveness, it brought up Jesus’ teachings about forgiving others. Much like a number of his teachings, there is more to it than just reading the verses. We must first understand that forgiveness is expected from all of us even for the worst of sins. In reading the verses above, Paul questions to what degree should we forgive (seven times?). Let’s say we are asked to forgive a murderer. If it is someone we do not know, it may only take minutes. However, what if it was your mother or father? What if it were your sibling or spouse? The pain and trauma from such a death would be devastating, and the level of grief would be at times overwhelming. Surely we would not be expected to forgive such a sin, right?

Jesus’ answer speaks to a deeper understanding of our true plight and capability to forgive. Jesus in his infinite wisdom made His bold statement in verse 22 saying seventy times seven times. It is important to note that this is not translated in the New International version, which stated seventy-seven times but instead the King James version, which in this case is truly at the heart of what Jesus’ true intent was. Taking this to mean seventy times seven, this would equal 490. If we forgive one who has sinned against us once a day, it would mean we would forgive them for roughly a year and 4 months. Imagine day after day for that long of time forgiving one for their transgressions. Through those first few months, we are still angered and feeling bitterness toward that person. However as the process continues and we continue to devote ourselves to Jesus’ teaching each and every day through prayer, our hearts are filled more with the Holy Spirit less by the pain. By the time we are at that first year mark, perhaps we might begin to feel the true level of forgiveness that Jesus expected of us, and by the time we have reached that 490th day, we would truly forgive that person.

Jesus Christ truly loves and understands us! He knew who we truly before we would ever come into existence, and like the wonderful Lord he is, He knew what we may endure. Furthermore, He went a step further, and served to be a shining example of what is asked of all of us taking on our sins as an act of forgiveness. As the Lord’s Prayer says, “Forgive us of our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us.” It was God who first forgave us of our sins. It is my prayer that we learn the true art of forgiveness. Amen.